Book 3 —C17
I’m not sure how we managed it, but three days later we are on a private jet heading back to Los Angeles. Louisa managed to convince her father that she should accompany me home because she had some meetings set up regarding their new project. He agreed and offered up the company jet and so here we are bound for home and hopefully the answer that we both desire more than anything.
Over the past three days, we have grown closer, and I have loved spending time with my new family. Louisa has been happier at work now Brad has been warned off and I spent glorious time with my mother while dodging Sienna’s endless invitations to show me off to her friends.
“This is nice.” Louisa stretches out opposite me and smiles sweetly, and I swear my heart skips a beat. I can’t help desiring her. She is everything I love. Funny, smart and completely unaware of her natural beauty that manifests itself every time she looks my way.
We have a connection that we can’t ignore, which is why this weekend is going to be an extreme test of resistance.
“It’s been so long since I went to LA.”
“I didn’t know you had.”
I take a swig of the whiskey offered to me in a crystal glass by the company stewardess.
“Yes, my father had a house there, possibly because that’s where he originated from. Not that they visited much. I’m guessing the bad memories kept them away. We spent the odd vacation there until he sold it and bought a penthouse instead. I’ve never been there. As I said, it’s been a long time.”
I’m grateful he does because now we won’t have to head to my own apartment, which I’m a little relieved about. Not that I’m ashamed of my modern sterile penthouse, but it’s always been my escape from life. Nobody ever goes there, which is what I like. I wasn’t sure how I’d cope with another person in my personal space and it’s best to stay in unfamiliar territory for both of us.
I laugh softly. “I still can’t believe you persuaded your father.”Property of Nô)(velDr(a)ma.Org.
She giggles, which makes me smile. “Probably because he’s feeling guilty about Brad. He could tell I was upset, and he would never admit it, but he would agree to anything to make me happy.”
“I can understand that.” I stare at her with a deep yearning that I’m hoping I’m hiding well because this is pure torture. More than anything, I want to experience what Louisa tastes like. She is like the most tempting forbidden fruit hanging just out of reach.
My motto has always been one night only for a very good reason. Emotion. I don’t react well to that and yet I’ve always had a deep yearning for a connection with someone, probably because it’s always been denied to me.
Now I have everything I want except for one thing. Louisa could be my cousin and related by blood. Which is why I’m so eager to discover the truth because I stand to gain much more than the relief at not sharing DNA with a psychopath.
By the time we touch down, I’m desperate for answers. This weekend is going to be torturous enough sharing an apartment with Louisa. I’m not sure how I’ll stop myself from touching her, desperate for one lick, one swipe of the tongue to satisfy this carnal urge that is consuming me.
I know it’s not me either. It’s her. She wants me too and I can tell that by the unguarded lust in her eyes when she thinks I’m not looking. The blush to her cheeks as she looks away and the rapid breathing when I brush against her or take her hand. We are dancing a complicated tango and I just hope we get to finish it because how will I recover from this aching need if it turns out I can’t have her?
DIMITRI HAS ARRANGED a car and a driver, and we are soon heading into town, and I’m not surprised when we pull up outside the most luxurious hotel in LA and discover Dimitri’s penthouse within its luxurious walls.
Louisa looks tired and, as the doorman helps the driver with our bags, I take her hand and walk proudly beside her inside.
Once we retrieve the key, we take the elevator to the final floor and, as it opens, we step into the purest luxury.
“This is amazing.”
Louisa’s eyes are wide as she stares around at paradise, and I must agree. Obviously, Dimitri appointed the finest designers and as we stare at the modern trappings of success, I’m even more determined to live this life myself.
The finest art and the most exquisite furniture adorn a huge loft style apartment that’s boasts the city as a backdrop, courtesy of the floor to ceiling windows that reveal the city outside.
“I wonder why I haven’t been here before now?” Louisa says with disappointment. “In fact. This is one of several my father owns but rarely steps foot inside.”
“It’s impressive. I can’t argue with that.”
Louisa sighs and looks troubled.
“What?” I’m quick to ask and she says slightly bitterly, “It’s just a waste. All of this money tied up in a museum piece that rarely sees life. How is this right when so many have so little?”
“Says the daughter of a billionaire.”
She turns and I love how her eyes flash with a temper that stirs my interest even further.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you know shit.”
I’m being deliberately cruel, but I can’t help it and say roughly, “The world is full of injustice, baby, and you are one of the lucky ones. You enjoy a privileged life and yet feel bad about that. You tell me other people deserve more. Well, of course they do. Nobody deserves to live with no food, no money, and no home to call their own. Nobody deserves to beg for food and worry about where their next meal will come from. There is pain and suffering in the world and there is absolutely nothing you can do about that, except cleanse your own conscience by holding charity fundraisers and doing your bit. Admirable but not enough and you know what, it will never be enough and there will always be somebody richer, somebody with more and people who waste their money and that will never change.
So, darlin’, step off your soap box and be grateful for what you do have and live your best life, but never judge how other people choose to spend their money until you have your own to make your own choices.”
“You think I’m a hypocrite.”
She faces me down and I’m loving the passion blazing from her eyes.
“Aren’t you? I mean, we flew here in a private jet, for fuck’s sake. You agreed to stay in your father’s penthouse, and you have a credit account that knows no limits. When was the last time you did something good for someone who needed it?”
“I…” She looks for an answer and the defeat in her eyes tells me I hit the mark.
“Exactly. You have noble thoughts but do fuck all about it. Don’t beat yourself up about it, baby.
We all live the life fate dealt us and just be grateful yours is better than most.”
She looks down and I say gently, “If it’s any consolation, I’m worse than you.”
Stepping toward her, I lift her pretty face to mine and whisper, “I have money. More money than I can spend, and I get it from crime. I ruin lives for a living, and I benefit financially from that. I give nothing back and I take. I am a monster because I don’t give a fuck because this is the law of the jungle and if I don’t do it, somebody else will. Things won’t change if I turn to religion and dedicate my life to helping others. There will always be a man like me in a dark suit calling the shots. There will always be a man profiteering from other people’s misery and there will always be someone more powerful than me. So, I embrace what I am, and I deal with it. I take the money and I couldn’t give a fuck. Does that make me a bad man? Of course it does, but in my heart, I am just trying to survive. I am a victim of my birth as much as you are, and that doesn’t stop me wanting a better life.”
She shifts a little closer. “What is that better life for you, Flynn? What would make you happy?”
I can’t help myself and reaching out, I let her soft hair filter through my fingers and her erratic breathing makes me lose my mind.
“I want to be able to love you, Louisa. Not as family, but as something more. To see what it’s like to give and receive love. To wake up beside someone who completes you. Not to be afraid of the shadows and to laugh. Feel a happiness that I believe love can give you. To watch my seed grow and create another person and devote my life to making theirs happy. To laugh, to love and to grow old because in my line of work, growing old is a long shot.”
To my surprise, she reaches out and touches my face, flattening her palm against my cheek, facing me with eyes awash with tears.
“I like the sound of your dream, Flynn. Do you think dreams can come true sometimes?”
I place my own hand over hers and whisper, “I think they can.”
We are so close one move would be all it takes to brush my lips against hers and descend into hell and so with superhuman strength, I pull back and say thickly, “It’s late. We should get some sleep because tomorrow will be difficult.”
As I break away, she nods and then says sadly, “There are two guest rooms. If you need any food, dad told me to order room service. He has an account with the hotel, and he will settle up.”
I nod and as we part ways and make our reluctant way to our respective rooms, tomorrow can’t come soon enough for me.