Rush: Part One & Two: Part 2 – Chapter 85
Today Andrea is going to announce who got the Formula Three seat. Haru and Lucie have officially told me they are dating a week ago, which is why they’re sitting across from me now, cuddling on the couch-like seating area. He presses a soft kiss to her lips, and she smiles against his. Such a simple action, but it makes me miss Gabriel with my entire being.
It’s been a week since I’ve seen him, since I’ve felt his arms around me. What makes all of this worse is James has barely spoken to me and the last time I saw him was the day I found out about the baby.
Evangelin has been avoiding me too, but I don’t have an explanation for that. Last we spoke, everything was fine. Maybe she’s upset because I haven’t gone to see her and Rush in a while. I’ll have to check on her when I fly back tomorrow.
“I’ll burn this place down if they don’t give you the seat,” Adrian says, ripping me out of my thoughts and bringing a smile to my face.
He was the only one who could make it here today. Gabriel has sponsor meetings and James has an ultrasound to attend with Annabel.
“It’s a possibility you might want to prepare yourself for,” I suggest, but he frowns at me in response.
“It cannot be, Valentina. What else do they expect of you? To not need a car and just run like you’re The Flash or something?” he asks, and I laugh at his analogy.
“I don’t know. Just, don’t get your hopes up, that’s all I’m asking,” I say, and he wraps his arm around my shoulder, pressing a kiss to my temple.
He doesn’t reply, merely holds me while we wait for Andrea to bring us the news I’m expecting.
“It’s so cute how you bring your brother everywhere. He’s such a good boy, always following you around,” Christian says, interrupting the peaceful moment Adrian and I were trying to have.
“Careful, he attacks on my command,” I warn, and Adrian starts growling next to me. The brat takes a step back, a disgusted expression on his face.
“You’re both so fucking weird,” he says, but walks away, looking over his shoulder with an expression which tells me he’s making sure Adrian isn’t coming after him.
My brother and I burst into laughter as he raises his hand for a high-five that I give him without hesitation.
“Valentina, Christian, are you ready?” Andrea asks, and I shift my eyes to where they are standing.
An unreadable expression lingers on their features, and fear consumes me. My rival and I get up at the same time, moving over to where our instructor is. Adrian is right beside me, like he has been for every moment leading up to this point, holding my hand.
“I want to let you both know you’ve done an exceptional job, and no matter what I’m about to tell you, you should be proud of your performance.” Their eyes are on me then shift to Christian throughout their speech.
“Whoever doesn’t get accepted is allowed to stay in the academy and train for another opportunity, right?” The question leaves me before the words have a chance to be processed in my head.
“Who gives a shit? Just tell Valentina I’m the one who got the seat,” Christian chimes in, and my stomach turns upside down.
Andrea stares at the ground before taking a deep breath. Their eyes carry back to me, sadness in them now.
Realization dawns on me.
“I’m sorry, Valentina, I tried everything I could, but Mr. Mattia and Mr. Reiner were firm on their decision to have Christian race in Formula Three. I’m so sorry,” they say, and I feel my head nod as everything inside of me goes numb.
“Hell yeah! I got the seat!” Christian celebrates as I sink into Adrian’s arms, the shock sending my body into temporary paralysis.
“No, fuck this! How is that possible? Valentina outperformed that prick in every category but one!” Adrian fights for me, and I regain my ability to speak.
“Do I get to stay in the academy?” I ask, but tears fill Andrea’s eyes then.
“No,” they reply, and I nod again, my mouth turning into a desert as swallowing my own spit becomes impossible. “They don’t want you to be a part of this academy.”
I can’t listen to any more, even though Adrian is arguing with Andrea now, demanding to have an answer they can’t give him. I turn around, ready to run away from all of this when I see Gabriel in the doorframe.
His face is full of pain, letting me know he heard everything.
“Chérie,” he says, his voice so soft, it shoves the tears out of my eyes and down my cheeks.
My body is frozen again because I’m not sure if I want to sprint into his arms, run from everything, or sink to the ground to let darkness swallow me.
“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” he says in French, and I rush into his arms.
He wraps them around me, enveloping me as if to shield me from all the pain and hurt my heart is trying to process. I sob against his chest, breaking down as he caresses the back of my head.
“Adrian, Andrea is not the one who decided this. Focus on what’s important, would you? We’ll get answers later,” Gabriel tells my brother before attempting to lead me out of the room. Christian’s words stop us.
“I told you I’d get the seat, belle. Don’t take it personally. It’s just how the world works, nothing you can do to change that, no matter how determined you are.”
“You know what, Christian? I may not have a dick to get me ahead in life, but at least I don’t act like one either. I hope you have a successful, long career. May lots of disappointments come your way so you can produce a better fucking personality,” I reply and step out of the room.
My feet don’t stop until I’m outside of the building where I collapse onto the ground. Breathing, crying, being, it all hurts. I cover my mouth and let out a scream, unable to hold it back any longer.
I scream for my grandfather, who gave everything to make my dream come true.
I scream for my father, who raced for me, but I’ll never be able to race for him.
I scream for Adrian, who yet again has to help me pick up the pieces.
And I scream for Gabriel, who feels my pain deep in his chest because our souls are intertwined.
They didn’t even let me stay in the academy…
“Mon amour,” Gabriel says from next to me.
I don’t know how long I’ve been in this position, crying over what I’ve lost, but the sun is setting now. My sobs have slowed, only shaking my body every few minutes. Tears still stream down my face, but they come as naturally as breathing now.
“We will get to the bottom of this, Val, I promise. There must be a reason why—” I have to cut my brother off then.
“Please, stop. Please. I can’t do this anymore, Adrian. This ripping pain in my chest, I can’t take it. I can’t fight anymore. Please, don’t make me fight,” I beg, treading closer to the dark hole in my mind I’ve been balancing around my whole life.Content property of NôvelDra/ma.Org.
Adrian takes my face between his hands, forcing me to focus.
“You listen to me, little champion, you will race in a Formula One car. This academy? It means nothing! It was supposed to help you, and, now that it didn’t, fuck that. We don’t need them. Lorenzo Mattia might be my boss, but I will make his life a living hell for what he’s taken from you today. We can’t stop fighting now because you haven’t made it to where you want to be yet. You’re not alone in this, you’ll never be. This is not the end of your story, Valentina, this is not where you give up on your dream,” Adrian says, standing up and holding his hand out for me. “I won’t let you, just like Grandpa and Dad wouldn’t. Fight for them, fight for us, but, most importantly, keep fighting for yourself.”
I slide my hand into his, unwilling to argue with him when he’s so full of hope.
“Okay,” is all I answer, but we know it’s done now.
There is nothing more we can do. I’ll let him figure this out on his own while I do my best to walk in the opposite direction of the darkness.
“Whatever it takes,” Gabriel adds, his hand cupping my face and wiping away the physical representation of my emotions. “Adrian is right. This is not the end. How could it be? Your story has hardly begun.”
I lean toward my boyfriend, kissing his lips in an attempt to relieve some of the tension in my chest. It works for a brief moment, until I pull back and reality sinks in again.
“I hate agreeing with anyone that isn’t me, but Gabriel is right. Then again, he’s recycling my words, so…” Adrian trails off with a shrug, and I let out a small, genuine laugh.
“Let’s go home, as far away from this place as possible,” I say, and they both give me a nod.
It’s time I get back to Monaco and figure out what the hell I’m going to do with my life now that my last chance has been ripped from me.