Reborn Heart of Steel

I was riding high after my session with Chase, my steps light as I headed down the corridor towards the audition room.

This was it-my shot at something big, something that could change everything. But I should have known better than to leave an opening to myself to be trapped.

I was walking down the corridor, and while I thought I was safe, I was suddenly smashed unto the locker, the breath almost knocked out of me.

“Think you are quite the sexy thing now, Lucy?” She spat at me, clutching my shoulders in a vice like grip with her talon like finger nails. You really thought you could barge in here and just steal whatever was rightfully ours you perverted scum.

I attempted to say something and out came a weak rasp. Behind Brittany I could see her two sidekicks Amber and Zoe standing in front of the hallway. A sudden spark of fear struck me when I came to the realization of my situation and how much of a prisoner I had become.

There was sadistic relish in Brittany’s voice when she said, “Listen up, little miss nobody. ” “This is our space, this is our spotlight You even think about outshining us out there I swear on everything, I’ll make you wish you never grabbed a mic ever”

I wanted be defiant, yelled at her for causing all this, but fear had its choking grip on my neck. The only thing I could do was to nod and I immediately regretted doing so.

Looking at Brittany, lip curled into an incredibly smoky sneer. Smart girl. ” And if you dare beat us… then just wait for your big break, sweetheart. ” She pushed me and walked off with Amber and Zoe giggling behind her.

I leaned against the wall and was choking causing me to make a gagging sound.

My mind was reeling. How had this happened? Why me?

I hadn’t done anything to them, had not attempted to take someone’s focus away from what they were doing.

I was just here to follow my passion as everyone else, to sing and perform and do what I wanted.

As I tried to breathe through the hardness of my chest, fear started to slowly enter my mind.

Maybe they were right. Perhaps, I shouldn’t be here.

Who was I to think that I could go head to head with beautiful girls like Brittany or Jessica whose fathers might have had them singing lessons since they were in the womb?

For a minute I considered that and then my mind shifted to my mother laboring in the diner all through the single shifts and overtimes, in order to make me buy a suitable dress for this audition.

I ended up thinking of my little sister, Mia who would gaze at me lovingly whenever I sung her to sleep.

And I thought of Chase, of how happy he was when he listened and sang at the same pitch as me.

No. I couldn’t give up. Not now. Not when I was so close.

Sliding to the floor, I tried to stand up, conscious of the dull pain in my back.

I had to whisper to calm my nerves so, I adjusted my clothes and combed through my hair with both my hands.

This meant that I had to gather myself and stand firm.

The judges wouldn’t wait and I could not sit back let this chance slip out of my hands.

Slowly gathering my courage I walked towards the door of the audition room.

I certainly could not move like I usually did, my legs felt like they were made of jell-O, my heartbeat was intensely loud. But I kept movin’ one small step at a time.

That moment when I stepped out into the spotlight the stage was very blinding and that is why when my sight was somewhat normal I saw them.

Chase’s father and the great-grandmother among the other judges.

He had a stern look on his face but did not flinch, Chase’s great grand mother, Nana Rose as they refer her to her looked at me and smiled gently.

“Hello there, what is your name, and what song would you like to sing?” Another judge asked, holding a pen above his note book.

“Lucy Abrams.” I stated stunned at how firm my voice was. “I’ll be performing Rise Up by Andra Day.”

I took in a deep breath as I listened to the notes.

And then I opened my mouth and sang.

“You’re broken down and tired

Of living life on a merry-go-round

And you can’t find the fighter

But I see it in you so we gonna walk it outContent (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

And move mountains…”

As I sang, something shifted inside me.

The fear, the doubt, Brittany’s threats-they all faded away.

In that moment, there was only the music, only my voice rising and falling with each powerful line.

“I’ll rise up

I’ll rise like the day

I’ll rise up

I’ll rise unafraid

I’ll rise up

And I’ll do it a thousand times again…”

I poured everything I had into those words.

I poured every dream, every struggle… I sang for myself, my future… Chase.

On the last note, I opened my eyes and noticed the judges with a smile on their faces.

Was Nana Rose crying?

“Thank you, Lucy,” Mr. Ryder said, his voice softer than I’d expected. “That was… quite something.”

I let out a quake breath as I realized…

I’d done it.

A soft ‘thank you’ escaped my lips.

Despite everything, I’d gotten up there and given it my all.

Whatever happened next, they couldn’t take that away from me.

Chase appeared out of nowhere, slinging an arm around my shoulders.

“There’s my partner!” he said loudly, steering me past the mean girls. “How’d it go? Bet you knocked their socks off.”

I couldn’t help but smile, grateful for his perfect timing. “I think it went okay,” I said, allowing myself to relax a little under the safety of his arm.

“Okay? Please,” Chase scoffed. “I heard you from down the hall. You were amazing, Luce.”

As we moved on, I could feel Brittany was eyeing me up and down.

But for once I was able to just let it roll off my back I had faced my fears and knew I would be fine.

Whatever was next I was prepared for it.

The rest of the day was somewhat of a blur.

The auditions continue, more waiting time, more moments of nervous conversations among the show’s participants.

I was somewhat a loner after the mini concert, not saying much to anyone and was still in my own world thinking over the outcome of my performance.

It was not until the later part of the afternoon that they notified us all to gather back in the auditorium.

I felt much nervous as we all entered the reception and looked round for any familiar faces to fix our eyes at.

I saw Chase sitting a few seats forward and he gave me a thumbs up gesture.

At the center of the stage was Mr. Ryder and due to his authoritative aura, everyone was effectively dominated by him.

“First of all, I would like to express my gratitude to all of you for your efforts and passion.” He started, “Today I could witness a fantastic level of people’s skills. ”

I fidgeted with my fingers, nervous because I wanted to win so badly.

“There are only few people who have made it to the next phase. I’ll be listing them out.”

Fear enveloped me and I could hardly hear a thing when he started to read out names.

I saw a few-some of them were our local performers, others that came from other cities but had performed in well-known theaters…

Brittany got called and she gave me a look of ‘you can’t outdo me.’

I’d already given up, believing the Chase’s father was done with them list and I didn’t make it.

“Lucy Abrams. ”

For a minute, I thought I’d misunderstood what has been said.

But then Chase was turning around, grinning and giving me a silent cheer, and the girl next to me was nudging me to stand up.

Still in shock I slowly got up from the floor and did not even hear the applause. I’d done it. I’d actually done it.

When I entered the stage with the other selected participants, I glanced at the facial expression of Brittany in the audience.

Her face had the bitter disappointment of a woman who had been forced to choke down something undeniably sour, her glace seething with barely contained rage.

But for once I did not look away from her scowl; I had earned this, I had earned it legally and squarely.

Finally up on stage, Chase’s father was congratulating us and shaking our hands. He hesitated when he was at my side.

“What a show, Miss Abrams,” he murmur intelligently. “I can hardly wait to see what you are capable of. ”

I could only say “Thank you sir” before I moved, and the feeling of pride washed over my face.

While we were led off the stage to receive our packets of information, we started to realize the true nature of the show.

I hugged my notes to myself when I fell to the ground. Someone had pushed me.

“Hey what did we tell you huh?” Brittany gripped my collar, her eyes filled with disdain.

“I earned this Brittany.” For the first time, I spoke up for myself, not withstanding the fear in my chest.

She sized me up with her gaze, and I sized her up too. I wasn’t going down without a fight.