Planned Baby

Chapter 36 AMNESIA

“She’s confident because you and I are still single. If you want her to back off, then marry me, Ellie.”

He was serious when he said that. I know he means it.

“I can’t marry you. I’m sorry.”

I was about to go to my room when he grabbed me.

“Tell me the reason, why you can’t marry me.” He said in a cold voice.

I almost shiver because of the coldness of his voice.

“I told you, you can’t marry me because of the kids. It’s not fair for the both of us.”

“I told you, Ellie, so many times that I like you. I don’t think I am just like you. I am sure that for the longest time, I am already in love with you, Ellie. I know you can feel it too.”

He touched my face. I can see the love in his eyes. But I just can’t accept. I refuse to believe it, not again. His face went closer to mine. He kissed me. It was a sweet and gentle kiss. I kiss him back like how I usually do.

“Say something, my Quinn.” He whispers.

I flinched. He called me ‘my Quinn’ again. Did he finally remember me?

“What do you want me to say?” I whisper back.

“That you love me too. You always kissing back, meaning you also feel something towards me.” This content provided by N(o)velDrama].[Org.

I push him away. I gave him a cold stare then smirked. “We can always kiss and remain as friends. I got that from you, remember?”

He looks confused as if he was hearing weird things from me. Then he clenched his jaw. “I am not your college first love, Ellie. Don’t compare me to that bastard!”

I laugh bitterly. “Are you seriously don’t remember me? I just removed my eyeglasses now, but my looks are still the same. And my name? Can’t you even remember it? Am I that unworthy to you?”

“W-what are you saying, Ellie? I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“La Salle, Business management, a nerd girl with eyeglasses, the girl who loves to draw, the girl you always pester until two got close with each other, the girl you encourage to take up architecture and engineering because that is what she was passionate about, you advise her to take up business management as her masters. Still now ringing a bell?”

He remained to look confused as if trying hard to recall the things I told him. “I really can’t remember Ellie; I knew that something is missing after I had my accident.”

I look at him in disbelief. “You didn’t tell you had amnesia!”

“Because I didn’t know I had! But now you are telling me stories that I don’t recall, so I’m guessing that maybe I had amnesia. I will go to the doctor who attended me when I had an accident. You can come with me if you want Ellie to prove to you that I was telling the truth.”

I sighed. “Fine. Let’s go to the doctor tomorrow.”

The next morning, Ulie and I went to the doctor he was referring to last night.

“I am sure that you had no amnesia when you had an accident. But you had dissociative amnesia after you committed suicide a week after you woke up from being comatose for three months. You were a bit confused when you woke up and found out that you committed suicide. We run some tests for you since we suspect that you had that kind of amnesia because of your reaction after you woke up. I think it's best to ask your parents about it.” The doctor explained to us.

“What’s a dissociative amnesia means doc?” Ulie asks for clarification.

“Dissociative amnesia or psychogenic amnesia is a kind of amnesia where a person blocks out a certain information, mostly associated with stress or traumatic events, leaving a person unable to remember important personal information.” The doctor explained further.

“You had a session with a psychiatrist when you were in the US right?” The doctor asks.

I nodded. “Yes, my parents arranged it for me.”

“You committed suicide Ulie?” That is the only thing that stuck in my mind.

I needed to ask him or else I will not stop thinking about it. I knew he was guilty about the accident but to that extent of committing suicide. I shiver at the thought of Ulie doing that.

“I was not sure why I did that. My parents told me about my accident. I remember it but it’s not that clear. I feel like something important is missing.”

He hugs me and kisses my forehead. “I’m okay now, Ellie. You don’t need to worry about it. It was done long ago.”

I shake my head. “No, Ulie! I can’t force myself to be okay after hearing it. Never do that again, promise me!”

“I won’t, Ellie. I will never leave you and the kids. You are my life now.”

After we went to the doctor, Ulie called his parents asking them if they are in the mansion because we want to talk to them.

We are now in their living room. Kaela was not in the mansion, it’s just me, Ulie, and his parents.

“We talked to the doctor who was assigned to me when I had an accident.” Ulie started the topic.

His parents flinched. “Why did you meet him? Is there a problem?” His mom asks worriedly.

“Mom, I’m good. It’s just that, I think I lost some of my memories. There are things that Ellie is telling me that I can’t remember. As per her, we knew each other when we were in college. We were classmates during our first year in the University.” Ulie explained to them.

Auntie and Uncle look shocked. Even they had no idea about our friendship when we were in college. I never had a chance to meet them. Ulie always talked about his parents and his plan to introduce me to them, but it never happened.

“Really? What a small world! And you can’t remember her Ulysses? What kind of a man are you!” Auntie started to scold him.

“Mom, I really can’t remember! I told you something important is missing after I woke up from the suicide thing.” He hissed.

“So, Ellie was the ‘something’ important that you are referring to?!” Auntie said in a teasing tone.

“Mom, stop with your teasing. We have a serious matter that we need to discuss.” Ulie sounded irritated.

“Fine. The doctor informed us about your condition, that’s why we arranged a psychiatrist for you. As per your psychiatrist, the memory that you lost might have a great in fact on your life and hurt you at the same time, that is why you chose to block it in your memory. We thought that the painful memory that the psychiatrist is referring to is the people who died during that accident. We chose to let that go. We don’t want you to have that same pain again that leads you to kill yourself.” His mom said a bit emotional.

“I guess, aside from that accident, you also block Ellie in your memory,” Uncle added.

When we went home, I was still speechless. This was Ulie’s life I never heard of. I still can’t over the fact that he tried to kill himself. I am thankful to God that he protected him from himself. I may have issues with him, but I will never want him to leave me completely.

“You believe me now?” Ulie said while we were in the living room.

The kids are already asleep. I tried to look normal while I’m with the kids. I don’t want them to find out about it.

“It’s the least of my concern now Ulie. You tried to kill yourself!” I said feeling my tears welling up in my eyes.

He hugs me again. “I told you to get over it.”

“I want to, but I can’t!” I hissed while removing the tears in my eyes.

“Now tell me you don’t love me!” Ulie said.

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t try to change the topic!”

“I’m not! I know, it will be hard to win you back since I lost my memory of you. I will do my best to remember you again. I promise.” He said in a sincere voice.

“But remembering me might also mean you will remember the painful memory of your accident, the very reason why you tried to kill yourself.”

I don’t care if he remembers me or not. Just like his parents, I don’t want him to remember the pain that leads him to kill himself. I don’t want to risk it.

“I won’t, Ellie! I promise.”

I shook my head. “No, Ulie! I don’t want you to remember me. I don’t want to risk the possibility of you, remembering the painful past that made you try to kill yourself.”

“I want to win you back, Ellie!”

“Then win me back without those memories. I will give you a chance to redeem yourself.”